The Royalist Party
The Royalist Party of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland has been described as many things. The former Conservative Prime Minister Jack Clark stated:
“Stable leadership. Something they (The Royalist Party) need to be commended for.”
King Wolf Kuluaiku of Hawaii stated:
“(The Royalist Party) have been key in securing Hawaiian independence.”
Finally former Conservative Leader of the Opposition Conor Novak stated:
“(The Royalist Party) frankly fought for a better UK.”
How does a party receive such praise and a pleasant send off after it’s final hours? Well there’s a few reasons. The people giving them praise were all politicians. People who since their kind words mean nothing and may not be screwed against them only benefit those providing them by allowing them to look as if they were good sports. As the expression originally stated by Diogenes Laëritus in ‘Lives and Opinions of Eminent Philosophers’, “De mortuis nil nisi bonum”. This translates loosely into English as “Do not speak ill of the dead”.
Why not speak ill of the dead so to speak? There is no benefit unless the deceased partner is inherently hated. The Royalist Party being it has a support base that’s politicians are scurrying to grab quickly before the general election to prop themselves up don’t benefit from isolating the former groups that formed the Royalist Party’s voting base. You can mark my words here if you’d wish. You’ll never see a politician defecating where he eats to cripple himself professionally.
So how did the Royalist Party begin? A wing of the British Liberal-Democratic Party deemed that they’d sunken their party name after several terms of self service and a lack of progress most notably under the former Liberal-Democratic Prime Minister Tormentium. He deemed it necessary to force a Conservative minority government out of power by forming a coalition with the British Labour party, and then doing absolutely nothing other than delivering a disappointing and lazy replacement to London. This lead LordPalladia to rebrand the party in order for himself and his circle of elites to continue to function and advance within British politics.
During the leadership of Tormentium this was not more prevalent. During his first term to enable himself into the government to the position of Deputy Prime Minister he coalitions with the Center-Right Conservatives. In the next term in a hard fight to advance further he coalitions with the Center-Left Labour. Originally when in coalition with the Conservatives they claimed to be a Center-Right party themselves, but soon dropped that after entering coalition with Labour.
Tormentium and LordPalladia got their fill off of a new and refreshing party that fought for the ever oppressed nobility of British society (sense my sarcasm) by brown nosing the British crown they managed to be the secondary party of government and then the major party of government.
So Tormentium seeing where the wind was blowing then tossed the party to his good friend and partner in crime Tentacools. Where he proceeded to ruin the credibility and general word opposition so poorly that he had his arm twisted to stand aside for the election in July. This being done by the soon to be former Prime Minister SidousthePwnda.
After SidousthePwnda was lifted up by the Wellesley Royal Family and BBC with such jarring and hardball questions as by Jon Watson (Profralston):
“So Sid as one Panda to one nation, what’s your goal this election?”
The issue that people don’t realize is when you hand power to a man on a silver platter that’s genuinely drooling over it and will rebrand themselves every few months to continue to hold onto power. Oh by the way Mr Watson was rewarded for playing his part in collapsing the Conservative government that allowed the early election and manipulation of the BBC to softball him questions during the election to enable him to gain an all but parliamentary majority. He was made Chief of Military Intelligence 6.
The question everyone’s asking now however is ‘so what happens to the British political spectrum then?’. To put it simply it’ll mean minimally one term under the Conservative Party. Due to their lack of political opposition it could be in an outright majority or it may be in a coalition with the Liberal-Democratic Party. Either way it means the Liberal-Democrats revival will be short lived, and UKIP will start doing very well being that’s their newest shell in which to dispense power.